There are worse fates than death... That's the theme of my substack reading this week. Martin Shaw has a really beautiful article about death this week too.
I think I could devote an entire newsletter on the art of dying. I bet just between your stories and mine we would have so much to share. I have written a lot about death in my notebooks. Who is Martin Shaw? Thanks for reading, friend.
I'm sure we could perhaps a guest post or collaboration is in order...Though the time course of our stories would probably be different. Martin Shaw is a storyteller and mythologist and author and wilderness initiation guide. He writes here on Substack and I quite enjoy it.
"less is more" and "rest is resistance" both resonated with me deeply. Thank you for this thoughtful writing Nessa. From one MD who cares about health more than the system seems to, to another, in solidarity...
“I do not believe everything I think anymore.”LOVED this. During the night my most intrusive dark thoughts/memories surface. How do you abort those thoughts?
Dearest Josie! Thanks for reading and commenting. Yes our monkey brain has great potential to go even more wild at night. I do not resist it.
The first thing that may help is to not try to “abort” it but instead just watch them. Observe don’t absorb. Get popcorn. Take notes. My dark thoughts are like soap operas. When you watch long enough without reaction, you start to understand that most of them are not even real. They are just stories conditioned by prior trauma.
Another way to alleviate such suffering is daily practice of mindfulness, protection of sleep and rest states.
With practice of my attention/awareness, I end up being very stingy with brain cells preserving them only for present moments and important tasks for the day.
Otherwise my mind is clear.
I practice to transmute painful thoughts of past traumas/events/fears into wisdom.
I practice not giving brain cells to future thoughts/fantasties/stories that may or may not happen.
Freedom is de-identifying with your thoughts.
Some days you will make headway. Other days not so much. That is ok as long as you return to the awareness/mindfulness path.
"Sue me, I can no longer fathom harmful societal norms. My body is allergic (anaphylactic actually) to systemic structural violence of the human world." Wow, Nessa, you've really said it all in this piece!
Thank you Sydney! For reading, sharing, commenting. For all the things.
I love pelicans so much. Lately I go watch them at a bird sanctuary nearby. I take notes like a citizen pelican scientist. I call it my pelican briefs. I sit on a slab of beach where the river meets the sea. Under their flight path. There are rarely any humans around luckily.
They have fierce nurturing, resilience and adaptabililty qualities that stand the test of millions of years- all things we humans can learn from. I think it is no mistake that I keep finding substack Pelican kinship these days. Thanks to Rachel Carson, they are still alive for us to coexist with.
So true - look into a pelican's eye is like gazing back through patient history :) We have Rachel Carson to thank for do much conservation that a modern world seems overwhelmingly bent to erase 😡
Thank you, Nessa. So much wisdom. I’m really feeling that piece about rest as resistance. Sometimes the voices are so loud, endless laundry and groceries and emails and scheduling and organizing. It’s hard not to do, do, do!!! Love how you’re sharing you voice, sister. You are an inspiration.
Thank you sweet Lily. For taking the time to experience these posts that are from my heart to yours. The good news is that the veil has been removed. While it is hard to witness the entrapments of dominant culture norms, it is good that they are crumbling. They harm us all.
There are worse fates than death... That's the theme of my substack reading this week. Martin Shaw has a really beautiful article about death this week too.
I think I could devote an entire newsletter on the art of dying. I bet just between your stories and mine we would have so much to share. I have written a lot about death in my notebooks. Who is Martin Shaw? Thanks for reading, friend.
I'm sure we could perhaps a guest post or collaboration is in order...Though the time course of our stories would probably be different. Martin Shaw is a storyteller and mythologist and author and wilderness initiation guide. He writes here on Substack and I quite enjoy it.
"less is more" and "rest is resistance" both resonated with me deeply. Thank you for this thoughtful writing Nessa. From one MD who cares about health more than the system seems to, to another, in solidarity...
Thank you for the kind comment! It is great to hear from you. Thanks also for reminding me that there are many agents of change out there.
There are kinder and more humane ways of doing this. May we find peace during this chaotic transition.
Yes agreed!!
Amen, sister.
I’m a nurse. There are worse things than death.
Thank you for this post. It speaks volumes.
Love everything about this. Thank you for being on the truly healing journey, Nessa, and for taking us along for the ride.
“I do not believe everything I think anymore.”LOVED this. During the night my most intrusive dark thoughts/memories surface. How do you abort those thoughts?
Dearest Josie! Thanks for reading and commenting. Yes our monkey brain has great potential to go even more wild at night. I do not resist it.
The first thing that may help is to not try to “abort” it but instead just watch them. Observe don’t absorb. Get popcorn. Take notes. My dark thoughts are like soap operas. When you watch long enough without reaction, you start to understand that most of them are not even real. They are just stories conditioned by prior trauma.
Another way to alleviate such suffering is daily practice of mindfulness, protection of sleep and rest states.
With practice of my attention/awareness, I end up being very stingy with brain cells preserving them only for present moments and important tasks for the day.
Otherwise my mind is clear.
I practice to transmute painful thoughts of past traumas/events/fears into wisdom.
I practice not giving brain cells to future thoughts/fantasties/stories that may or may not happen.
Freedom is de-identifying with your thoughts.
Some days you will make headway. Other days not so much. That is ok as long as you return to the awareness/mindfulness path.
It is like triage so you got this!
"Sue me, I can no longer fathom harmful societal norms. My body is allergic (anaphylactic actually) to systemic structural violence of the human world." Wow, Nessa, you've really said it all in this piece!
Also, because I totally relate to your Pelican-kinship, I just had to share this story with you! - https://sydneymichalski.substack.com/p/theyre-both-my-best-angle
Thank you Sydney! For reading, sharing, commenting. For all the things.
I love pelicans so much. Lately I go watch them at a bird sanctuary nearby. I take notes like a citizen pelican scientist. I call it my pelican briefs. I sit on a slab of beach where the river meets the sea. Under their flight path. There are rarely any humans around luckily.
They have fierce nurturing, resilience and adaptabililty qualities that stand the test of millions of years- all things we humans can learn from. I think it is no mistake that I keep finding substack Pelican kinship these days. Thanks to Rachel Carson, they are still alive for us to coexist with.
So true - look into a pelican's eye is like gazing back through patient history :) We have Rachel Carson to thank for do much conservation that a modern world seems overwhelmingly bent to erase 😡
Thank you, Nessa. So much wisdom. I’m really feeling that piece about rest as resistance. Sometimes the voices are so loud, endless laundry and groceries and emails and scheduling and organizing. It’s hard not to do, do, do!!! Love how you’re sharing you voice, sister. You are an inspiration.
Thank you sweet Lily. For taking the time to experience these posts that are from my heart to yours. The good news is that the veil has been removed. While it is hard to witness the entrapments of dominant culture norms, it is good that they are crumbling. They harm us all.
Toodaloo 🤓 great writing - bittersweet are the awakenings - the veil has lifted - go and enjoy your life 😍